Weekend Reads #21

For those who think blogging is an easy job, you're so wrong and this week was such an example. All those fun events that bloggers attend are work. You spend so much of the time there trying to capture great photos and video for blogs and social and then you're looking at your phone to edit and share instead of live in the moment. Before being at that event, you're doing calls and emails to schedule and plan, after you're emailing metrics and thank yous and trying to secure future opportunities, and then well… figuring out all those outfits. And creating content. And pitching and collabing for future content. This week I averaged four hours of sleep each night, missed three days of the gym, and still turned in one deliverable late (which is eating me up inside because I hate being unprofessional and unreliable). Yes, I worked this hard on a regular basis at my day job, there's no way I'd say blogging is harder than Corporate America but it's tough in a different manner and in many ways, tougher.

But Wednesday my friend invited me to speak at her college class about being a full-time blogger. I got there early to get a bit of a tour of the gorgeous campus of Howard University. It was a beautiful day, the first sunny, non-muggy day in a long while and we sat on a bench outside in the shade to enjoy the weather and catch up. She used to have a day job and teach part-time. This year she also made a leap, quit Corporate America to be a full-time professor. Less pay, weirder hours, but so much more joy. And we sat there, just watching the students walk by, the sun come through the trees, felt the breeze and I feel the joyful energy coming off both of us was visible. Yes, our jobs are stressful and emotionally taxing and never really over, but when it's what you love to do and what makes you feel fulfilled… it's the good kind of exhaustion, the kind you get after moving into your first home or completing your first marathon.  I haven't felt exhausted like this in years, hell, in decades.

This weekend I am going camping with my family; I'm writing this as Karl is packing up the car with coolers, tents, and our canoe. We have a housesitter, a mail gatherer, and all the laundry has been washed and put away. I may end up sleeping in the car on the way there but am excited for a few days away from everything.

This piece from The Huffington Post about obesity is a must-read for everyone. Seriously everyone, even those who have been slim all their life.  Read it, share it with your relatives, share it with your doctor.

The badass that is Tammy Duckworth. Loved this piece in Vogue about her and love that's she's proof you can love this country, support our military, yet not have to support our horrible president.

The trailer for Captain Marvel came out, and critics felt Brie Larson's part was “wooden” and that she should smile more.  Her response was fantastic.

Okay, it's clear I love Jenny Bird jewelry. I have several pieces and they always garner compliments, even from strangers across the room.  They also hold up nicely, they don't tarnish, chip or start to look faded after a few months.  Jenny's (yes she's a real woman, check out her Instagram Stories to see the BTS of her business and her life) fall collection dropped and it's soooo good. From the fall collection, I already own the large Carmine Hoops and large Faye Knockers and have worn both many times on and off the blog.  However, I am falling for so many other pieces of this strong collection.  My picks below (click to see on the site with people wearing them to get the full effect):

At my old job, one department focused on end of life, hospice, and death with dignity. It really made me think, we should have the right when we are elderly and/or ill to die on our terms. So much physical and emotional pain happens at the end of life, so much money and anguish for our loved ones who have to see through it and fund the procedures and treatments that never heal, just prolong the torture. I've had many loved ones go through this, so when I read stories like this one about a woman who has picked her own death date I cheer. My hope is more stories about this topic will normalize it and open lawmakers' eyes to how respectful and honorable it is to own your life as well as your death.

Henri Bendel, the famous New York department store is closing after 123 years. Wendy Brandes shares her memories of the store and how through it she met her current hair stylist.

How do you find jeans that fit all day? Mine are great for maybe the first hour, but then they start to sag and bag all over. I’ve read to buy a smaller size, but again they are perfect for the first short time. I can’t seem to find denim without stretch anymore. HELP.

I've found it's less about the inclusion of stretch and more about the denim quality.  Jeans that are thin or super stretchy will bag out more quickly.  A tightly woven denim, even with a bit of stretch, will hold its shape better. Also jeans with a higher rise don't bag out as much because the waist is above the torso's point of bending and strain. Look for denim that is described as double ring spun, Japanese, raw, or selvedge for a tighter, higher-end denim. Different washes will stretch differently; denim in dark “rinse” washes and without any weathering or whiskering will stretch less than those that are distressed or faded.  When you have denim you love, do NOT put it in the dryer.  The dryer will break down the fibers, especially the Lycra, damaging the elastic so it won't retract as well. Wash denim on cold, hang dry from the legs.

Finally, many suggest to go a size down to account for the stretching that will happen.  I disagree and suggest you stick with your size or even larger and get the waist tailored to fit.  When the denim is being pulled taut it will strain the Lycra making it less likely to bounce back.  More expensive denim doesn't mean better quality, but I have to admit that the jeans I have that don't stretch out cost more and are from brands that specialize in quality denim (DL1961, AG Jeans, Universal Standard).  Below are some suggestions of denim that is less likely to stretch out:

Shop Denim: